If You’ve Never Heard My Music, Start Here

I get asked sometimes what “genre” my music is.

And the honest answer is: it depends on what part of the fire you walked in during.

Sometimes it sounds like a circus.

Sometimes it sounds like industrial insomnia.

Sometimes it sounds like an old theater that should’ve closed years ago… but the lights are still on anyway, because someone forgot to let the cast go home.

This playlist is *the clearest explanation I can give* of what I make and why I make it.

This is *the show.*

Fifteen tracks, arranged like a performance — beginning to end — the way my brain actually experiences the world when it’s trying to survive, trying to love, trying to stay ethical, trying to stay human… in a society that often rewards cruelty and calls it “normal.”

If you’ve never listened to my music before, don’t worry about context. Don’t worry about lore. You don’t need to know my albums. You don’t need to know my story.

Just press play.

Because the playlist tells you everything you need to know:

It starts as a carnival.

It becomes a confession.

It turns into a system.

And then it burns down and leaves you standing in the embers, asking the question that never really stops haunting me:

"How do we stay good in a world that keeps trying to break us?"

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🎭 What this playlist *is*

This is music about:

• trauma and survival (without romanticizing it)

• dissociation, shutdown, and “safe mode”

• the feeling of being watched, judged, measured

• the fear of sleep — and the exhaustion of staying awake

• grief that doesn’t get a clean ending

• ethics, care, and conscience *as rebellion*

• love and gentleness that *refuse to become weapons*

It’s circus-themed in the same way life is circus-themed.

Not “haha funny clowns.”

More like… bright lights, fake smiles, and the constant pressure to perform your pain in a way that makes other people comfortable.

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🩸 What you’ll hear as you listen

The playlist moves in phases:

1) The curtain rises (the world as spectacle)

“Stand in the Break – Circus Night”

“Static Choir – Popcorn and Peanuts”

2) The cracks start to show (that creeping dread, that “something’s wrong” feeling)

“Intermission – How Many More?”

“PLEASE HOLD (Sin Noticed)”

3) The system steps onstage (control disguised as care)

“Panopticon.EXE – Broken Chains”

“Welcome to Hell – For Your Own Good”

4) The mind goes into survival mode (numbness, shutdown, fragmentation)

“Safe Mode Saint”

“Nothing is Wrong II: Broken”

“Glitch in the Soul”

5) Sleep becomes unsafe (night terror energy, dread, no closure)

“Night Terror Overture”

“Nevermore – Terminal Refrain”

6) The theater burns down (grief, unsent messages, what’s left after love)

“The Last Stage of Ember – Burnt Set”

“I Never Said Goodbye – Unsent Signal”

“Embers (If This is the End)”

7) The encore (because you’re still here, and the room never sleeps)*

“Encore (The Room Never Sleeps)”

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This isn’t background music.

It’s a mirror I turned into a stage so I could survive looking into it.

So if you listen… thank you.

Really.

And if anything in here resonates with you — the exhaustion, the fear, the moral tenderness, the grief, the feeling of trying so hard to be good in a world that doesn’t reward goodness —

Then you’re not alone.

🎪 Here’s the playlist. Start at track 1. Let it play in order.

And if you want, tell me which song hits you the hardest.